What It Really Means To Woo White Voters

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COLUMBIA, SC - JUNE 28: Senator Rand Paul speaks to supporters during a Republican Party BBQ on June 28, 2013 in Columbia, South Carolina. Paul is attending fundraisers and meetings with local tea party groups. (Photo by Richard Ellis/Getty Images)

Salon:

I have a visceral reaction to conservatives arguing that Republicans should forget about trying to lure Latinos by passing immigration reform, and focus on turning out white voters instead.

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Nadia Cho: Being Queer Means...

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"Queer" is not a term that is universally recognized and understood in the common vernacular. So in honor of Pride this weekend, I attempted to present the many different sides of what being queer means. "Queer" can be used to describe someone's sexual orientation or stand as a political statement. Its definition has many dimensions, from gender identification to a resistance against structural rigidity to a strange sensation or state of being. "Queer" isn't a word that many people clearly understand when used to describe yourself. Allow me to elaborate what being queer personally means to me, as "queer" means different things to different people.

Being queer is first and foremost a state of mind. It is a worldview characterized by acceptance, through which one embraces and validates all the unique, unconventional ways that individuals express themselves, particularly with respect to gender and sexual orientation. It is about acknowledging the infinite number of complex, fluid identities that exist outside the few limited, dualistic categories considered legitimate by society. Being queer means believing that everyone has the right to be themselves and express themselves without being judged or hated because that doesn't fit in with what's normal. Being queer means challenging everything that's considered normal.

Being queer means ceasing to think in binaries like "male" or "female," "gay" or "straight," "monogamous" or "non-monogamous," because there are more than two sides to every person and every context. It means being aware of and OK with the fact that our own identities and sexualities are always in flux, never static. Being queer means recognizing that there are alternate gender identities, such as transgender or genderqueer or androgynous folks, and respecting that these identities are just as legitimate as those that are visible.

A queer worldview deconstructs and obliterates all established notions of gender. Gender is a set of socially constructed roles arbitrarily assigned to everyone based on physiological reproductive traits. Being queer means embracing supposedly "masculine" and "feminine" traits as simply universal human traits and ignoring the behavioral expectations that are socially imposed according to our non-consensually assigned gender. Genitals don't tell men that they can't wear dresses and women that they have to wait to be asked out; cultural norms dictate gendered behaviors. Being queer means doing away with gender altogether, because it restricts the ways people can freely and unlimitedly express themselves.

Being queer means being attracted to anyone, with no regard to a person's gender or sex. It could mean someone is attracted to more than one gender, or even two genders. Being queer means you like what you like and you accept that your desires are dynamic and you are open to change. Being queer means being sex-positive and recognizing that sex is good and everyone has the right to have as much or as little of it as suits them. It means thinking about sex in different ways other than the heterosexual, male-pleasure-oriented, meant-for-reproduction kind.

Being queer means constantly questioning what's considered "normal" and why that norm gets privileged over other ways of being. It means criticizing who sets these norms and recognizing the privilege that comes with being able to identify as "normal." Being queer means confronting all forms of oppression and bringing as many unheard, minority experiences and stories to light. Being queer means addressing and understanding the intersectionality between race, gender, sexuality and class and how it affects each person's experience and identity differently.

Being queer means searching for alternate ways of being and living. It means learning to appreciate and celebrate difference and striving for constructive, fair and happy ways to coexist with each other. Being queer means constantly looking for ways to be as inclusive as possible in order to create a world where everyone feels safe and accepted, in which there is true equality for every single person.

Being queer means embracing a free and open-ended identity by casting off all other identities that categorize us, and defining ourselves simply as human beings.

For a sassier, more explicit version, read this on nadiacho.com.

Follow Nadia Cho on Twitter: www.twitter.com/nadiiacho

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Paul Gorrell, Ph.D.: The End of DOMA Means the End of Civil Unions

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We anxiously await the Supreme Court decision on two cases related to gay marriage. There is good potential for SCOTUS to strike down DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act, signed into law by Bill Clinton. This would open up federal marriage benefits to individuals married in states where same-sex marriage is legal. While many want the gay marriage fight to be state by state, we need to remember that there are federal benefits for married couples that elude gay couples who are legally married all because of DOMA. If DOMA is struck down, there is one sure of victim of this victory: Civil Unions.

Civil Unions and Domestic Partnerships were an attempt to provide some legal recognition to same-sex couples while not allowing the usage of the word "marriage" to describe the relationship. This created a "separate, but equal" status for same-sex couples. This model was endorsed by some conservatives, even fiercely anti-gay marriage proponent President George W. Bush, as a kind of compromise that often offered the same exact benefits that straight married couples receive at the state level. Since DOMA prevented every gay couples from the federal benefits of marriage, whether legally married or in a civil union, the argument was that civil unions were a balanced compromise.

My partner and I decided to have a civil union in our home state of New Jersey because our financial advisor put the benefits and protections in front of us on paper and we could not deny that it was a protection for us at the state level and with any potential inheritance fights that could occur when one of us dies. But, something about it has always bugged me. While I am no longer a religious person, the word marriage has more transcendence to it while the notion of a civil union seems transactional.

There are moments when this is clearer to me. For instance, whenever you go to a hospital or doctor's office and fill out the many forms they give you, they ask for personal information that includes your marriage status. The options are single, divorced, married, widowed. I have never seen an option for a civil union. I make a point to let the person at the desk know that my legal relationship is not recognized on the form. They often ask, "well isn't it marriage?" And, I answer, "not according to the law of our state." After some complaints, Facebook added civil unions and domestic partnerships to its profile page. In the end, civil unions take care of the legal aspect of your partnership. But, they don't help you manage the societal aspect of your partnership. This is why marriage matters.

When my partner and I had our ceremony, we decided to downplay it. We had a surprise ceremony inviting about 10 friends for a dinner at our house. The mayor showed up, we announced our civil union, and the ceremony began. It was a very happy evening with a lot of joy. We joke that we became "civilized" or "unionized." In humor is truth, we are not married. And, knowing that our relationship is not the same as our straight friends just seems unfair. I feel that sense of injustice every single time I say to someone that we are in a civil union. It never leaves the conversation about our relationship. The law removes the joy.

Politicians who like the "separate, but equal" compromise will no longer have that option if DOMA is struck down. Why? Because, now they will be the ones who block their state's residents from receiving federal benefits. They will be the ones who do harm to their constituents; they won't be able to blame DOMA anymore.

Follow Paul Gorrell, Ph.D. on Twitter: www.twitter.com/PaulGorrell

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